Saturday, July 22, 2006

[simpsons] Classic moment makeup gun

Homer:    Now, this next one's for the ladies. 
How many times have you gals been late for a high-powered business meeting,
only to realize you're not wearing make-up?
Marge: That's every woman's nightmare.
Homer: That's why I invented this revolutionary make-up gun.
It's for the woman who only has four-fifths of a second to get ready.
Close your eyes, Marge.
[Homer fires the make-up gun, which appears to be a shotgun with some containers of liquid attached,
into Marge's face.
After the cloud of dust vanishes, she ends up with way too much on]
Homer: Now you're ready for a night on the town. [holds up a mirror]
Marge: [gasps] Homer! You've got it set on "whore".
Homer: Okay, this time try to keep your nostrils closed.
[Homer points the gun at her, but she pushes it away from her face.
A vaguely face-shaped blotch of make-up stains the wall]
Homer: Oh, look what you did. Now I have to go get my cold-cream gun.
Lisa: Dad, women won't like being shot in the face.
Homer: Women will like what I tell them to like!